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Sundray@lemmus.org to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish ·
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1 day ago

Federal agents in DC assaulted with sandwich, freedom fighter escapes

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Federal agents in DC assaulted with sandwich, freedom fighter escapes

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Sundray@lemmus.org to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish ·
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1 day ago
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  • maam@feddit.uk
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    7 hours ago

    Never mess with the heavy eating his sandwich

  • Øπ3ŕ@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    10 hours ago

    So… I gotta know. Was it a hero’s hero he launched?

  • RaoulDook@lemmy.world
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    17 hours ago

    What’s the charge? Delivering a footlong meal? A succulent foot-long meal?

    • LordCrom@lemmy.world
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      15 hours ago

      It would be assault of a police officer and resisting arrest. Looks like that guy in pink was running in slow motion vs the special forces wanna be’s wearing 50 lbs of armor and equipment.

      Throwing sandwiches should become the new protest en masse.

      • chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        14 hours ago

        I think it’s just a play on succulent Chinese meal guy (he’s dead now).

  • Uriel238 [all pronouns]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    15 hours ago

    I keep trying to formulate a plan in my head:

    On one hand ACAB: They all promote the national security culture within the law enforcement sector that we civilians are the enemy. The departments are all corrupt through and through

    On the other hand the non ICE officers hate being used as S𝑖𝑐ℎ𝑒𝑟ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑡𝑠𝑑𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑠𝑡 or Einsatzgruppen (German SD, or Death Squads, respectively) to pick on innocent civilians to be shuttled away to concentration camps. And I wonder if there was a way for the public to tell them we’re sorry they are being abused by being repurposed as general goon squads, and if that might encourage them to resist more than they do.

    Also, ICE agents, either pre-Trump used to sometimes engage in action that at least had the appearance of legitimacy, e.g. tracking people with violent records. New recruits (post OBBBA Budget) were told they’ll be hunting the worst of the worst and then are picking up day laborers and ice-cream vendors, which is soul crushing for even MAGAs who wanted to be the hero.

    We need to be able to take these sentiments and weaponize them against the system, and the policy-makers that are forcing them to be evil fucks for The Man.

    I don’t know the specifics, but there’s a schematic in there somewhere.

    • Øπ3ŕ@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      10 hours ago

      Oh? They “hate” that, do they? Cite your references to that claim, please. Otherwise, your comment seems to stop at “ACAB” in its efficacy. 🤌🏼

    • Carl@sh.itjust.works
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      14 hours ago

      ACAB? American cops are bad?

  • mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca
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    20 hours ago

    what a hero

    handoff food delivery for those fine fucks, whoops folks, in the gestapo

  • Rymrgand's Daughter @lemmy.world
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    24 hours ago

    Nah he was a hero delivering justice

  • Mitch Effendi (ميتش أفندي)@piefed.mitch.science
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    1 day ago

    Godspeed, you hero of gyros, you hoagie heroine, you rigoletto of Ruebens…

    • resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world
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      22 hours ago

      Sammie Samaritan.

    • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      A grinder goodie.

      • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        The Po’ Boy Protestor

        • j_roby@slrpnk.net
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          1 day ago

          An American Gyro

    • nkat2112@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      My goodness, so poetic - I love it! And I fully agree with you.

  • Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip
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    1 day ago

    The hero we need.

    • aegis_sum@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      The gyro we need.

      • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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        23 hours ago

        A large sandwich\sub is literally known as a “hero” sandwich. Why would you try to take that perfection away to go for “gyro” , that is neither pronounced the same, or is a similar sandwich?

        • Sinthesis@lemmy.today
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          14 hours ago

          adjust nerd glasses technically speaking…the greek word gyro is pronounced “eeer-o” so its not that far off from “here-o”

        • sylvieslayer@lemmy.world
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          17 hours ago

          …go google Greek Gyro, then go find your closest Greek restaurant and educate your taste buds. Tust. They will be happy.

          • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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            15 hours ago

            Oh, don’t get me wrong. I love eating them. But the guy threw a hero sandwich.

            • sylvieslayer@lemmy.world
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              9 hours ago

              Ah my bad! I misunderstood your comment

        • FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world
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          23 hours ago

          You should know, Cole, that everyone loves a pedant.

          • PattyMcB@lemmy.world
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            22 hours ago

            Plus gyro DOES rhyme with hero

            • foggy@lemmy.world
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              22 hours ago

              Pure poetry.

              • Rivalarrival@lemmy.today
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                16 hours ago

                Pyrotry?

            • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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              19 hours ago

              Gyro does, but gyro doesn’t.

        • LousyCornMuffins@lemmy.world
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          20 hours ago

          book ‘im lou. one count of bein’ a bear, one count of bein’ accessory to bein’ a bear

  • HellsBelle@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    Here’s the director’s cut. :)

    https://old.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/1mnvn87/full_video_of_dc_sub_guy/

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      The way they leapt at him the moment he threw it tells me that what he was saying and doing was actually getting to them.

      We need more of this.

      Also, I know I often laugh when I’m uncomfortable, so maybe that’s it, but the camera man is about to find out that maybe having the Gestapo take over your city isn’t actually funny.

      • burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de
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        18 hours ago

        The way they leapt at him the moment he threw it tells me that what he was saying and doing was actually getting to them.

        I mean, I highly doubt it. They were paying keen attention to the fellow screaming and yelling within a chucked sandwich distance, and he then threw a sandwich at them. They’d probably been considering what they could get him on (besides white or rye) for the entire time he was yelling at them because anyone close and loud is likely the biggest ‘threat’ much more so than any of them having a brain at the point of them going in with any seriousness after being ordered into a city with a lower per capita crime rate than the white house.

        • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          18 hours ago

          Right, but like all of them took off after him lol

    • Chivera@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      That sub belongs in a museum

      • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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        19 hours ago

        Oh, Spez is working on it

    • khannie@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Damn! He was close when he threw it. Solid work getting away.

    • VioletSoftness@piefed.blahaj.zone
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      1 day ago

      this was beautiful thanks for sharing it

  • j_roby@slrpnk.net
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    1 day ago

  • DaddleDew@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Are those the dangerous gangmembers Trump was talking about?

    • RedPostItNote@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Don’t you know it’s worse than Baghdad!

    • Raoul Duke@piefed.social
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      17 hours ago

      They got clubbed.

  • 😈MedicPig🐷BabySaver😈@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Fucking fantastic!

  • LousyCornMuffins@lemmy.world
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    21 hours ago

    I could hear this in my head the entire time he ran

  • Formfiller@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Not all heroes wear capes

    • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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      23 hours ago

      Some just have hero sandwiches?

    • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      But he does have a wrapsheet that’s a foot long.

  • beatnixxx@fedia.io
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    1 day ago

    a domestic terrorist using a sandwich of mass destruction. /s

    • FuckFascism@lemmy.world
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      21 hours ago

      Sandwich of ass destruction.

      • burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de
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        18 hours ago

        Just like taco bell, you should probably get your colon’s health checked digitally if eating a random sandwich from a chain is giving you issues.

    • Possibly linux@lemmy.zip
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      19 hours ago

      The murder weapon was composed of ham and cheese

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