Your dad found you a date and is willing to pay for it. Like some sort of reverse-pimp. Pimpzarro.

I say go for it. I’m more of the “I hope they cancel so that I can wallow and spiral alone at home” kind of people, but I loved dating at your age. Primarily because it was an opportunity to possibly gain a friend and you might make someone’s night better by just being yourself.
And if they wholly reject you as a person, you can brush it off as “dates are awkward to begin with, I’m sure I started with a disadvantage.” And then learn from that. If y’all decide to be friends instead, you can ask her what parts of the date she liked and how you could improve your next date.

Everyone’s talking about how the worst she can do is say no. I disagree. The worst she can do is want a second date because then you have to charge up your social battery for that. Sometimes, though, you find someone who’s worth tapping into your social battery, and sometimes, it just comes naturally and you find someone who makes you feel like you can be you.

Very soon if not already

yeah, my comment definitely sounds like I’m saying that the victim was a child. I’m just referring to the argument that all the politicians made about why we need bathroom bills.

No one who isn’t an evil motherfucker is going into bathrooms to victimize children. How do you know if someone is an evil motherfucker? Well, the low-bar starts at “willing to check other people’s anatomy to find out if they can potty in this room.”

I miss canoeing… I miss my childhood

Child predators, right?

Most medals won by a puddle of bruises

possible hazardous materials

And we’ll never have the answer since everything good in the government got cut. People are either going to have never existed or will die from democrat diseases.

Good enough!

… Aaaaaaand now there’s vomit on my phone

It’s certainty not an MY ism… It must be aneyourism!

Yeah, if you can keep them running, they’re surprisingly efficient. And they hardly ever jam. But all the printouts look like garbage and feel like you’re trying to interpret ancient runes. When we got our first inkjet printer at home, I suddenly struggled to read anything from the ol’ dot matrix.

I can’t wait for LLMs to start asking for Better Help promo codes

Quit posting memes about me

Disbelievers and heretics get their city a visit from Marshalla.

Oh yeah? I raise you stacks of perforated pages and tractor feed accordions

That’s because color hadn’t been invented yet and therefore people could only see in black and white. That’s why old shows don’t have color.

Certainly better than spaghettification

right meow

“Hold onto my butts!”
- Sam Jackson horking down another ciggie

Big if big

“She hate me cuz I’m black”
- Piss-baby Greg Abbott